Trump vows Atlantic Sea Wall to Stop European Illegals

Calling European illegal immigration to America “dangerous” and “shocking”, Trump vowed an Atlantic Sea Wall to stop Europeans. “They landed their ships and seized our land, killing our brothers and sisters”, spluttered Trump, blasting the thousands of illegal European immigrants who captured land from Plymouth to Jamestown. “They’ve given us smallpox, death, and slavery”, fumed Trump, his orange hair flopping about. As his unctuous countenance glistened under the media glare, Trump thundered,”European illegals plunder our fertile land with their slave plantations.” He stopped to draw breath and his scrunched-up visage looked like a toad awaiting a particularly tasty insect. “We will build a wall, a serious wall, so high that it will stop the 3 S’ of European ships, smallpox, and slavery.”

Trump’s bead-like eyes darted around the room, perhaps scanning for a potential wife. “Every European nation will pay for the wall — I guarantee it.”, Trump blathered. “Without European illegals, we will make American great again. I guarantee you. I guarantee you.”, Trump huffed. “I guarantee”, Trump gasped again, like a stuck recorder. “We will make American great again, just for Americans.”

One thought on “Trump vows Atlantic Sea Wall to Stop European Illegals

  1. Sludge on

    He’s the embodyment of everything I hate in this world, even if he’s nothing but a joke.

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